No Longer Alone
by BellaNight
Summary: Remus Lupin wants to be understood, to be loved by someone. But does the person of his adoration return this feeling? If someone could understand the monster, and realize that he is something else, perhaps he could be loved. But who would love a werewolf?


**Note:** Yikes, another one-shot! This time, however, it isn't a songfic. Finally, you say. Oh, and it's my first proper slash fic, so do tell me what you think. Of the writing, that is, not of the pairing. To be honest, I don't really care if you think slash is "gross" or "icky" or what have you…I just care whether or not my writing is at all headed in the right direction. If you don't like it, by all means, TELL ME WHY! Don't just say "You suck…I hate you!" If you do want to write that, then write all of that and then add "because insert appropriate complaint here".

THANK YOU!

**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine. It all belongs to J.K. Rowling and her respective publishers/the people who made the movie. Ta for not suing.

**No Longer Alone**

He frowns, his dark eyes narrowed, his brow furrowed in frustration, tapping his fingers nervously on the table. He doesn't know I'm watching him, I'm sure. It would just seem so wrong to him. Or perhaps it wouldn't. He accepts my abnormality-my curse-after all. Perhaps all is not lost.

Suddenly I realize he's no longer reading, but looking up at me, a lopsided smirk on his lips. Does he know? Would he tell me if he did know, or would he be disgusted? How am I meant to know what to feel? And how am I meant to know what he feels?

"Remus, are you alright mate?" I blink rapidly, coming back to my senses. Sirius is staring at me, the smirk now a full-blown grin.

"Yes, why do you ask?" I reply, trying my best to hide my guilt. But then I have never been much good at lying, which is precisely why my friends learned of my monthly transformations. Sirius lets a bark-like laugh, and I can't help but smile myself.

"Because you were all googly-eyed and looked as if you'd been hit on the head with a mallet. So, who's the lucky girl then?" he asks cheekily, winking at me. I blush, but not because of his comment. He must know by now.

"Girl?" I stutter, the colour still rising in my cheeks. How can he just sit there when I feel like I do? I need to tell someone; the constant lies are staring to become ridiculous.

"Yes, Remus; girl. You know, the fairer sex, the ones with breast," he laughs, brushing his long hair out of his eyes. I don't know what answer to give him, so I content myself with shaking my head timidly, gnawing nervously at my lower lip. It's a habit I have always had, and I'm quite sure it annoys everyone who knows me.

"I don't know what you're talking about…" I mumble, gaining more colour, if that is even possible. I must resemble a beetroot by now. A beetroot with the messiest handwriting on the planet. I'll never be able to read these notes.

"Whatever you say, mate," Sirius replies with an air of someone who has just discovered someone's dirty little secret. "But, you know, whoever she is, she's lucky."

It was such an offhand comment, and yet I can't help but wonder if maybe he feels the same. But no, he could never love someone with my hideous condition. I have had my share of girlfriends, but nothing long term. And I have never wanted someone to return my affection as much as I do now. Girls are only interested in me because of Sirius and James, but they are wasting their time: James loves Lily far too much to ever betray her, and Sirius would never take a friends girlfriend. It is his loyalty that separates him from the rest of his family.

"Remus, I'm going to dinner. You coming?" I look up, and Sirius is standing in front of me. I shake my head, looking back down towards the paper that needs completing. If I don't finish it before tomorrow, I'll get a less than perfect mark. Not that grades are the most important thing in this world, but since I don't have anything else going for me…

"I have a paper to finish for McGonagall, but I'll see you in the common room tonight," It's a simple enough answer, and yet Sirius doesn't move.

"Remus, you haven't eaten dinner for the past three days. If something's bothering you, you can always tell someone," he says, placing a hand on my shoulder. I shy away. I'm so confused, and yet I understand perfectly. I don't how these feelings make sense, but I know what I feel.

"Really, I'm fine," I assure him, a little more harshly than I intended. And Sirius still doesn't leave, merely looks more carefully at me. "What? Sirius, I need to finish my work. McGonagall told me-" I'm cut off by his finger covering my lips. We're alone in the library now, and I can feel my heart pounding more quickly than before.

"Nothing, Remus, not even schoolwork, is worth destroying yourself. Don't ruin the only person who isn't tainted by evil," he says softly. I don't know how to reply, but I needn't have worried about my response. Before I had the chance, I felt Sirius' lips on mine. My heart pounded in my throat. And then, almost as suddenly as his lips had made contact with mine, they left mine.

"Now, come and eat dinner with me, Remus," he says, taking hold of my hand and almost lifting me out of my seat. I follow in a daze, blissfully unaware of all the pain I once felt. I am no longer alone.

_end_


End file.
